Once You've Learn To Be Lonely
by Remmie Lupin-Black
Summary: Once you've learned to be Lonely there is no turning, you're comfortable with it. And Naruto has come custom with it but fate it decides to give Naruto the happiness that he deserves even it comes from tragedy.


Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto and Co.

Author Notes: I would just like to warn you that you might need several Kleenex, I know I did and I wrote the story. Also, please don't kill me! Enjoy!

* * *

**Once You've Learned To Be Lonely**

Sorrowful blue eyes gazed up at the twinkling night sky; the full moon hung low in the crystal clear sky. Why did he think that he could have ever been accepted by everyone? To everyone, even to the ones that he cherished, he was just a demon; a monster that could turn on you at any second, just like Gaara. Small shoulders dropped as a sigh escaped; maybe everyone was right. Maybe he didn't deserve to life.

"Something on your mind, Naruto?" came a quiet voice. The small blonde jumped and turned to see the gentle face of his former teacher; Iruka stood several feet away from where Naruto was perched on a log in the middle of the clearing. The dolphin-named teacher walked toward the blonde that despite every odd had wormed his way into his heart; "mind if I sit?" Naruto shook his head and with that Iruka sat beside the long, leaning against it. "Now this is a sight. Makes you forget the world around" Iruka commented, gazing at the sky.

"Yeah".

"You were awfully quiet today" Iruka said. His warm brown eyes looked to Naruto, who was staring up at the sky. "Is something wrong?"

"Anou, Sensei" Naruto started, not bothering to look at his former teacher; "do you ever feel that sometimes you don't have the right to exist?" Iruka sighed and looked at the grass before looking at the sky; somehow, Iruka wasn't really all that surprised by Naruto's question.

"To tell the truth, Naruto" Iruka began, quietly. "I've always doubted my existence, believe it or not. It's probably not in the same way that you feel but I sort of understand the pain". Iruka reached behind his head and tugged on his ponytail before continuing; "as you know, my parents were killed by the Kyuubi and many of my comrades killed by enemy ninjas. But somehow with each event I always managed to survive no matter what".

"Yeah" Naruto said. "Kinda makes you feel cursed, doesn't it".

"Oh yeah" Iruka replied. They fell silence for several minutes, merely gazing at the beautiful starry sky that shone over head; "sometimes I use to wish that I had been killed with my parents or on those missions that I went on. I use to think that anything was better then this life".

"Do you think that ninjas have a place in heaven?"

"No doubt".

"What about me? I mean, I'm not exactly the best person with the Kyuubi and all".

Iruka looked at Naruto, who gazed up at the sky again. "I believe that the Gods would never blame a child for anything that they had no power over" Iruka replied. "You are not any different, Naruto".

"They always make me out to be different" Naruto whispered. He sighed, again, and slid down to sit beside Iruka; his head rested against the log. "I never really did anything that condemned their action towards me just because I was born. I used to believe that Mama and Papa were up there, watching over me but-". Naruto suddenly stood up, dusting off his pants; "I better get home, Sensei, I have a team meeting tomorrow morning". On impulse Naruto hugged Iruka before heading off; but for some reason Iruka felt that this may be the last reason he ever saw Naruto. Iruka looked up at the stars, an old love song dancing through his mind.

_Once you've learned to be lonely, _

_And lonely is the only thing you've know;_

_It begins to feel like home, it becomes your comfort zone. _

_And once you've learned to be without_

_Someone and settle for the silence of an empty room;_

_Ooh it changes you; there's a lot you have to undo, _

_Once you've learned to be lonely._

* * *

Morning dawned over the Hokage's Monument, shining down upon the sleepy village; Naruto was already up and waiting at his team's spot for the day's meeting and probably the beginning of the day's training. Naruto was sitting on the bridge, watching the fading stars in the sky and the incandescent colors in the sky. He was enjoying the peace and tranquility of the morning; Sasuke and Sakura wouldn't be arriving until a hour later and Kakashi would be arriving three hours after that. Naruto used this hour to just enjoy himself before he had to pull on the mask that he wore.

"Well, if it isn't the little demon" came a sneer. Naruto looked up to see three drunken Chunnins standing near the bridge; Naruto rolled his eyes and turned away, his eyes returning to the sky. Usually, if he ignored them, they left him alone but however this time it wouldn't go that way. Naruto was yanked out from his thoughts when he was dragged from the ground, roughly; he was backhanded by the lead Chunnin. "Teach you to disrespect us" sneered the leader.

"How about we have some fun" said a second.

"Yeah, some fun" agreed the third. Naruto struggled as the three burly Chunnins dragged him away from the meeting place; Naruto knew then and there this was probably the last time that anyone would ever see him alive.

* * *

Kakashi frowned when he saw only two of his students at the schedule meeting place for team seven. "Where's Naruto?" Kakashi questioned, worriedly.

"Dobe wasn't here when we arrived" Sasuke said, shrugging. "Probably slept in".

"That would be just like him" Sakura agreed. Kakashi snorted at that; Naruto sleep in? Fat chance . . . that boy gave a good number of Jonin a run for their money with his determination and loyalty.

"Come on, let's go find him" Kakashi said. With that the scarecrow-named Jonin headed off with his two students walking behind; now, if he was Naruto, would he be?

* * *

Naruto lay, bleeding, in a nearby clearing; he cough up blood as his uninjured arm curled around his stomach. "Looks like we've reached the end, ne?" Naruto said softly; he could feel Kyuubi's chakra working frantically to heal his wounds but Naruto knew that it was useless. "Betcha you kinda wish to go with a bang, huh, Kyuubi? Go down fighting some big ass demon like Shukaku. Not beaten to death by some drunken Chunnins".

Naruto knew that he probably sounded foolish talking to himself but he knew that Kyuubi understood him. "Kinda wished that I died like that" Naruto said, softly; tears filled his bright blue eyes. "Guess Fate doesn't have that in store for me". Naruto felt himself drifting away; but he had to grin to him. He hadn't been easy to take down for those Chunnins; he gave them hell. The sounds of footsteps alerted Naruto, who looked up into the horrified face of his former teacher.

"Naruto!" Iruka gasped and ran to his smallest student; carefully, Iruka propped the boy up and held him close. "Oh, gods!" Iruka was near tears and almost gagging at all the blood that was draining from Naruto's body; "hold on, Naruto, everything is going to be fine".

"Sorry, Sensei" Naruto coughed, blood dripping down from his mouth; "not this time". Blue eyes looked up into Iruka's brown eyes; "funny thing is - I ain't afraid, strange isn't".

"Naruto, don't talk like that" Iruka pleaded. As if sensing Naruto's impending death, thunder cracked over head and rain began to fall as though Heaven wascrying for the lost of such a bright and innocence soul. "You're gonna be okay, you're gonna be fine". Naruto grasped Iruka's hand and gave the dolphin-named teacher one of his truest smiles.

"I gotta go, Sensei" Naruto said, smiling. "But don't worry, I'll watch over you til your time, okay?" Iruka nodded, choking back his tears; Naruto felt himself slipping away. "Bye, Sensei . . . don't forget me, kay?"

"Yeah, no problem in that, Naruto" Iruka laughed through his tears; Naruto nestled his head against Iruka's shoulder, his eyes closing as if he was just going to sleep; Iruka held him closer as he felt his body go limp. "Naruto".

* * *

Kakashi and his students hung out under one of the canopies of the major stores of the village. "Sensei, look!" Sakura said, pointing to the silhouette in the rain; Kakashi turned his good eye toward the silhouette before it widened and Kakashi ran out into the rain. Sasuke and Sakura followed before stopping dead at the sight of their blonde-haired teammate in Iruka's arm; he was cradle with the utmost delicacy.

"Iruka?"

Dazed brown eyes jerked up and looked into Kakashi's dark blue eye; "Ka-kashi?" Iruka said, confused.

"Iruka, what happened to Naruto? Is he okay?" Kakashi questioned. Iruka looked at the whiskered face of his most beloved student then looked back up at the Jonin; Kakashi noticed Iruka's chin tremble before the Chunnin bowed his head. Immediately, realization dawned on Kakashi; wordlessly, he wrapped his arms around Iruka and pulled the trembling Chunnin close to his body, mindful of the body in Iruka's arms.

"Sensei?" Sasuke ventured, gently.

"Could you two fetch the Hokage?" Kakashi inquired. Both students looked at each other before obeying their teacher even though they looked as though they wanted to stay. "Come on, let's get out of the rain"; Kakashi lead Iruka off toward Naruto's place as it was the nearest.

* * *

Kakashi looked up as Tsunade exited the bedroom; she leaned against the wall, her shoulders shaking. "He's gone, isn't he" Kakashi stated more then asked; the Sennin looked up, nodding. Kakashi whirled around, his fist slamming into the wall.

"He wasn't even afraid that he was dying" Iruka mumbled from his place on the couch; Kakashi had sent Sasuke and Sakura home not wanting them to face the fact that their loud-mouth teammate would no longer be apart of their team. "How could a thirteen-year-old not be afraid of dying?" Iruka's pleading eyes looked at Tsunade and Kakashi. Neither could answer the Chunnin because they were wondering the same thing. Iruka looked at his hands which had now had dried blood encrusted into him; tears spilled down his cheeks and he tried to stop them by wiping at them furiously. Kakashi moved forward and pulled him into his arms allowing Iruka to cling to him, sobbing. Tsunade looked at the off-white ceiling; wondering how on earth she was going to break this to the children and a number of the senior ninjas that had befriend Naruto.

"Godaime-sama?" came a quiet voice. Tsunade looked up to see Genma and two other Jonins, Gai and Kurenai, standing in the doorway; Gai and Kurenai casted a bewildered look at Kakashi, who held Iruka in his arms. Kakashi ignored their looks in favor of trying to soothe Iruka; "we have the results you wanted".

"Good, let me hear them" Tsunade ordered.

"We found three Chunnins suffering from various injuries" Genma replied; "they claim that they were attacked by some monstrosity in the forest before they managed to fatally wound it and left it for dead. Godaime-sama, may I inquire what was the purpose?"

"Uzumaki Naruto is dead" Tsunade replied. She ignored the gasp of shock from Kurenai and Gai and the outrage sputtering from Genma; "from his wounds, they were Ninjas and members of our older ranks because of the slash mark across the Seal".

"The Seal!" Gai exclaimed. "But wouldn't that make it possible for the Kyuubi to escape?"

"Ah, so bushy-brows isn't as stupid as he looks" came a sneering voice. The gathering of ninjas turned to see a black-haired figure perched on the window; they knew immediately that this dark haired person was indeed Kyuubi. The two silver fox ears and the silver fox tail tipped with black kind of gave it away; Kurenai, Genma and Gai pulled out kunai and shuriken and positioned themselves in front of Tsunade, Kakashi and Iruka. "Please, if I wanted to hurt you . . . you'd already be dead". Kyuubi shifted on his perch; "but as I've already promised my Kit that I wouldn't. Besides, they've killed my kit, they've killed me".

"Kit?" Tsunade ventured.

"Yeah, you know . . . Gennin, blonde, about this height" Kyuubi said, "and smiles like the sun?"

"Naruto?"

"Hey, you don't live inside of a person and doubt have some kind of bond between you" Kyuubi replied. "I can give you information if you like, but only if you agree to one thing".

"And what would that be?" Kakashi said, softly.

"Easy, I want those three bastards that murdered my kit gutted" Kyuubi replied. "I don't mean none of that exiled shit either. I want them dead, as in six feet under the ground".

"Why?" Tsunade inquired.

"Two reasons" Kyuubi replied. "They murdered my kit and they caused Dolphin over there heart ache, seems fair play". Iruka looked up, his eyes red from crying; "hmm, maybe you could curse their souls while your at it, ya know for your own revenge. Anyway, I gotta head off; I got family to meet".

"Wait!" Iruka cried. "Naruto . . . where is - he's gonna be okay, right? In that other world?" Kyuubi smiled and nodded.

"Course he is . . . that boy had a heart of gold, he wasn't going anywhere but up" Kyuubi replied. "Besides, someone already came and got him the moment he closed his eyes; someone that wanted to meet him for a very long time. I gotta go, later". With that Kyuubi hopped from his perch into the rain and disappeared.

Tsunade turned to Genma, her blue eyes harding. "I want those three in jail" Tsunade ordered, "for the murder of one Uzumaki Naruto". Genma nodded and made to move off; "oh, and Genma, if they cause any trouble . . . you force if you have to". Genma grinned, sadistically. He nodded and hurried off; Kurenai and Gai heading out after him. "I don't pity those fools".

Iruka gave a sad smile before leaning against Kakashi, who combed his fingers through Iruka's ponytails. "What about his funeral?" he inquired in a small voice.

"We'll take care of it" Kakashi said. "I know this great little place that he'll love". Iruka nodded, before closing his eyes and faded into oblivion.

* * *

Three days later, a small service was held for Naruto in a beautiful little clearing near where Kakashi held the test that first allowed Sasuke, Sakura and Naruto to passed their Gennin test. Iruka was being supported by Kakashi as he listened to Tsunade speak quietly; several of the Naruto's female friends were crying thought Sakura was trying adamantly trying her hardest not to cry. But as soon as Sasuke touched her shoulder, she crumbled; falling to the ground, Ino and Sasuke knelt and held her close. "Iruka, you wanted to say a few words?" Tsunade inquired.

Iruka distangled himself from Kakashi and trembling went up to where Tsunade was standing beside the monument perched under the tree; he touched the monument before looking at the gathered crowd. "I remember the first day Naruto stepped into my classroom; he was only four then" Iruka began, smiling. "It's kind of hard to believe now how shy he was and how he stood behind Sandaime-sama, peeking out at the group of children. I watched him grow and learn, learning myself that there was no way that this shy and timid child, whose only dream was to become Hokage, was Kyuubi". Iruka rested his hand on the monument; "I was won over by Naruto's determination and his large heart. I know here today that he changed many people but he was forever etched into my mind as the lone child sitting on the swing". Iruka swallowed, blinking back tears; "I'd like to read something out: Once you've learned to be lonely, and lonely is the only thing you've know; it begins to feel like home, it becomes your comfort zone. And once you've learned to be without Someone and settle for the silence of an empty room; Ooh it changes you. There's a lot you have to undo, once you've learned to be lonely. This is a part of an old song that my mother use to sing and for some reason it always struck me as though it was talking about ninjas and of Naruto. I can only hope that wherever Naruto is now that he isn't lonely". Iruka rested the flowers that he had brought against the monument; he pressed his fingers to his lips before pressing them against the monument's plaque. Kakashi stepped forward and placed a bowl of instant ramen beside Iruka's flowers, earning a tearful laugh from everyone.

"Come on, Iruka" Kakashi said, gently. "Let's get you home". Iruka nodded and leaned against Kakashi as they walked away followed by Tsunade and Jiraiya and others after they paid their respects to the monument. Iruka looked over his shoulder before turning back; he felt Kakashi's arm tightened around him. "It'll be okay" Kakashi said, gently. "We'll get through this together".

"Yeah, together" Iruka said, softly.

* * *

Three Years Later . . . .

Iruka knelt before Naruto's monument; Iruka knelt and rested flowers against the monument. "How you're doing, Naruto?" Iruka inquired, gently; "a lot of things have changed since you've been gone. Lee proposed to Sakura, finally; we've all been waiting for it. Sasuke has finally managed to rid himself of his need to avenge his family and now is quite content with his new wife . . . hard to believe, I know. It's even harder to believe that it wasn't whom we assumed; Akira Natsumi - or, Uchiha Natsumi, she was the strong willed student from the academy a year younger then you guys. Sasuke needs someone to root him to the ground; they'll be expecting their son in a few months. Hinata and Kiba have also decided to marry, though I think Neji will have Kiba killed before the wedding. Speaking of Neji, he really hit it off with Shino and surprisingly, those two are dating; big surprise to everyone". Iruka laughed, softly; "Ino and Shikamaru have married, no surprise there, I suppose. Tenten was killed on a routine mission a few weeks back; I hope you were there to greet her. Also, Kakashi and I have finally been able to adopted those two children I've been telling you about; the ones from Grass country. A little boy and girl; Kakashi will be naming the girl because I've already named the boy, Naruto. Hope you don't mind, it's not like I'm replacing you or anything; I just want you to know that you'll always be remembered".

Iruka sighed and looked up at the cloudless blue sky and the shining sun above. "Tsunade and Jiraiya have finally decided to stop dancing around each other and were married a short while ago" Iruka said. "That was a big shock to everyone who didn't know; Jiraiya tells me that you were the first to know, not surprising. Other then that, Life goes on in Leaf as it has these last three years; I really miss you, you know". Iruka kissed the monument before standing to leave; he turned and stopped. There standing not that far away was Naruto, his spiky blonde hair alight and he was dressed in a white t-shirt and shorts trimmed with silver. "Naruto?"

The blonde smiled and nodded. "_I can't stay long, Sensei_" Naruto said, "_I just wanted to say that I miss you too and that I was there for Tenten when her time came; I'd be really honored if you named that little boy after me. Tell Kakashi to call the little girl, Hotaru, tell him that it comes from me, her big brother_". Naruto looked behind him; Iruka noticed a blonde haired young man with spiky blonde hair, it was the Fourth. Beside the deceased Hokage was a beautiful dark-haired young woman who graced Iruka with a smile. "_Well, I gotta go now, Sensei_" Naruto said, "_Mama and Papa are waiting. And I'll see you in a few years, I'm allowed to come and get you when you're times up but that isn't until a long time. By the way, your Mama and Papa says Hi and that Love you, very much. Bye, Sensei!_" Naruto turned around and ran to the couple standing behind him; his arms wrapped around the young woman's waist while the Fourth's arms came around the two. The small family smiled at Iruka before disappearing; Iruka smiled and wiped away a few stray tears.

"I'm glad your happy, Naruto" Iruka replied, "you deserved it". Iruka turned and walked away from the monument; heading home to tell his partner about the chance encounter with the guardian angel he now had and about the name of their new little girl.

_Once you've learned to be lonely, _

_And lonely is the only thing you've know;_

_It begins to feel like home, it becomes your comfort zone. _

_And once you've learned to be without_

_Someone and settle for the silence of an empty room;_

_Ooh it changes you; there's a lot you have to undo, _

_Once you've learned to be lonely._

THE END

* * *

The Song, "_Once You've Learned To Be Lonely_" belongs to Reba McIntire. 


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